The Hidden Value of Workplace Gossip
Forget the Rumors: Gossip Is a Crucial Tool for Team Collaboration
In this week's post, I challenge you to view gossip as not just negative, but also beneficial for your team. We'll explore:
Why gossip isn't the real villain
How to rethink gossip as a signal
A framework for understanding various types of gossip
Seven strategies to effectively manage gossip
Gossip Isn't the Real Villain
When you hear the word 'gossip,' what do you see? Probably images of hushed whispers, reputations under attack, and escalating team drama. It's easy to see gossip as toxic – a bad habit to avoid. But let's be honest: Haven't you ever found yourself drawn to a juicy conversation?
Gossip has a magnetic pull. We know we shouldn't indulge, yet we're curious. We crave the latest scoop and want to feel in the loop. But what if I told you gossip actually serves a purpose beyond just stirring up team drama?
The truth is, everyone gossips, whether we admit it or not. A study examining workplace gossip found that 96% of employees admitted to engaging in it. In my work with teams, I've seen it range from sharing harmless personal stories to more damaging comments questioning someone's reputation. Gossip, whether positive or negative, is a vital social tool. We use it to connect, understand our world, and sometimes warn others.
The real challenge isn't gossip itself – it's how we use it. When channeled properly, gossip can help build trust, share crucial information, and foster alignment. The key lies in funneling positive rumors while intercepting negative gossip before it harms your workplace culture.
Rethink Gossip: A Signal, Not a Symptom
The idea of gossip often triggers alarms about conflict brewing and its potential to harm team trust. However, gossip is simply informal communication – a tool as old as human society. It was never meant to be a negative habit.
Anthropologist Robin Dunbar famously proposed that gossip is the discussion of social topics. His landmark study found that gossip accounted for roughly 65% of all discussions in public spaces.
Gossip has been a crucial tool since prehistoric times. It has helped us navigate relationships, build trust, and vet colleagues. While evaluative talk's purpose has stayed the same, the way it manifests has changed – today it shows up in Slack channels, watercooler chats, and social media.
Ancient Greeks relied on informal chats and rumors to determine which community members to trust. Law courts used to base their decisions on reputation alone rather than on concrete evidence.
Fast forward to today, and the function of gossip still remains. It's a tool for navigating workplace complexities, often filling gaps left by formal communication. Whether we’re seeking sympathy or venting to alleviate anxiety, gossip helps us make sense of our environment.
Imagine two colleagues, Jess and Dominic, chatting about Kaylie. At first glance, it seems like they're gossiping behind her back. But what if they're discussing how Kaylie got a promotion that leadership failed to explain? Or perhaps Jess is frustrated, feeling sidelined in a recent decision, and needs Dominic's perspective on how to approach Kaylie.
This kind of gossip helps employees navigate workplace culture, especially when official communication falls short.
Studies show that gossip strengthens relationships, enhances trust, and increases job satisfaction. It helps release happy hormones, fostering a sense of belonging. Employees who share reputational information about colleagues can identify cooperative colleagues – and encourage uncooperative ones to improve, reducing the risk of being ostracized.
Gossip provides a lens into the organizational unwritten rules – the "way we do things here." Ignoring or trying to silence these under-the-radar conversations creates the opposite effect, breeding more secrecy and off-the-record chats.
However, it's important to distinguish between constructive and harmful gossip.
Contrary to popular belief, a significant portion of gossip is actually positive. Research revealed that 72% of gossip exchanges contain an equal mix of positive and negative talk, while 21% are predominantly positive. Only 7% of gossip conversations are primarily negative.
Some gossip strengthens relationships by building trust and providing valuable insights about team dynamics. However, many other forms harm your team. One example would be individuals who engage in behind-the-back criticisms or spread fabricated stories to further their own agendas.
Listen carefully to gossip and recognize its purpose.
Negative gossip often indicates underlying issues like a lack of transparency or broken trust. Gossip could indicate that the company vision is too broad and people don't understand what's expected of them. Attempting to silence this channel can have unintended consequences, leading to a more closed-off culture. Instead of treating gossip as a problem to fix, treat it as a signal.
Gossip isn't just a people problem – it's a cultural phenomenon. What does it reveal about your organizational culture?
Perhaps employees are feeling unsafe to speak up in the open. Maybe they lack the proper channels – or the right tools – to facilitate courageous conversations.
By paying attention to gossip, you can identify hidden frustrations, cultural misalignments, or unresolved tensions. People gossip about what matters to them or what they can't understand. Consider gossip as a tool for gaining cultural insights –address the root cause rather than silencing the symptom.
Harness the power of gossip by understanding how it manifests in your workplace. It serves as a cultural barometer, revealing the good, the bad, and the ugly of your organization.
Not All Gossip Is Created Equal – A Model
Gossip is complex – it comes in many forms and shapes, depending on its purpose. To better understand the different types, I developed a gossip matrix. It captures the most common expressions of gossip I observed in my work consulting with teams and organizations.
The Workplace Gossip Matrix categorizes eight types of workplace gossip by looking at two factors: Personal versus Organizational Focus and Issues versus Relationships. The first axis addresses whether gossip is about a person or the organization, while the second tackles concrete issues versus trust
The Workplace Gossip Matrix categorizes eight types of workplace gossip using two key factors: Personal versus Organizational Focus, and Issues versus Trust. The first axis examines whether the gossip centers on an individual or the organization, while the second axis explores whether the gossip deals with concrete issues or matters of trust.
Here's a breakdown:
Personal Focus / Issues Quadrant
1. Sympathy Gossip
Sharing personal grievances or seeking validation about how one was treated, often as a way to process emotions. This type of gossip helps validate one's experiences, and we expect others to take our side.
Example: A colleague feeling left out of a promotion and seeking peer sympathy.
Positive Use: Can foster empathy and support when someone has been genuinely mistreated.
Negative Use: Can lead to self-pity and resentment, fostering a sense of victimhood if unresolved.
2. Backstabbing Gossip
Criticizing or undermining a colleague when they're not present, often for personal gain.
Example: Someone criticizing a colleague who failed to challenge their manager's decision or badmouthing another to sway a manager's perception.
Positive Use: Virtually none. It might help people vent, but often at a significant cost to team dynamics.
Negative Use: Erodes trust, damages relationships, and creates a toxic work environment if left unattended.
Organizational Focus / Issues Quadrant
3. Debrief Gossip
Employees discuss organizational decisions, news, or updates to interpret their meaning – and gauge where everyone stands.
Example: Employees debating a return-to-office mandate and its potential impact on their personal lives.
Positive Use: Helps employees clarify their understanding of organizational moves and provides perspective.
Negative Use: Misinterpretations can cause confusion, dissatisfaction, or resistance to change.
4. Safe Gossip
Private conversations about sensitive workplace topics that people don't feel safe discussing openly due to fear of retaliation or repercussions.
Example: Employees quietly discussing favoritism and how not everyone is judged by the same bar.
Positive Use: Provides a safe outlet for processing difficult issues and brainstorming potential strategies.
Negative Use: Avoids direct confrontation, allowing problems to persist instead of addressing them in the open.
Personal Focus / Trust Quadrant
5. Reputation Gossip
Gossip about an individual's reputation, contributions, or character.
Example: Discussing a colleague's well-deserved promotion or questioning someone's integrity.
Positive Use: Spreading people's achievements beyond the team can boost morale and increase visibility. Leads to understanding of who's a team player and who's not.
Negative Use: Can damage reputations if based on false assumptions.
6. Bonding Gossip
Light, personal gossip that helps team members bond over shared experiences or non-work-related topics.
Example: Casual conversations about weekend plans or office incidents.
Positive Use: Builds camaraderie and trust, making employees feel connected.
Negative Use: It might create cliques and leave some folks feeling left out. Plus, recurring chit-chat can become a waste of time.
Organizational Focus /Trust Quadrant
7. Decoding Gossip
Long-time employees help new hires understand how things really work – the unwritten rules or informal culture of the organization. It also involves insiders sharing with their colleagues what happens behind closed doors.
Example: A seasoned employee explaining how to navigate the informal power dynamics to a new hire.
Positive Use: Helps newcomers navigate the culture and understand how to succeed in the organization.
Negative Use: When biased, it reinforces stereotypes or legacy norms – or even discourages new employees from changing things before they've had a chance to try.
8. Alignment Gossip
This type of gossip addresses (a lack of) alignment and whether leaders truly "walk the talk."
Example: Ironic conversations about how company values don't really shape behaviors or how decisions are made.
Positive Use: It can promote organic, authentic alignment and support as a result of team debate.
Negative Use: When used to undermine leaders rather than genuinely question their strategies, it can become a toxic space for criticism and negativity.
7 Strategies to Manage Workplace Gossip
1. Differentiate Constructive from Harmful Gossip
Not all gossip is harmful, and in fact, much of it can be constructive. Learn to recognize when gossip serves a positive purpose – such as sharing useful information, reinforcing team cohesion, or unearthing issues.
Just like positive gossip can strengthen trust, malicious gossip can harm reputations and deplete your team trust battery. Stop negative gossip right away before it becomes a harmful habit.
Leaders set the tone for how gossip is handled in the organization. Be transparent about why decisions are made, own your mistakes, and openly share information with your team. Remember, don't engage in the type of gossip you wouldn't want to see in others.
For instance, at Airbnb, every employee receives the minutes from the weekly Executive Meetings within 24 hours. This transparency reduces the temptation for employees to speculate or spread rumors.
2. Listen to the Signal
Gossip often reveals hidden issues within your organization. Instead of dismissing it outright, listen to what it's telling you about your culture.
Are employees feeling insecure about leadership decisions? Is there a lack of psychological safety that prevents them from speaking openly? Are there past issues people can't get over?
Gossip is a signal that something needs attention – be curious about addressing the root cause.
For example, Zappos uses the Voice of the Employee mechanism to uncover underlying issues. A few 'representatives' are randomly selected every week to gather team issues. They bubble up the concerns to management and then bubble down what management will do about it.
3. Uncover the Stinky Fish
Team issues don't magically disappear, and venting about it only makes things worse. Move the conversation to the right space. When things are discussed openly, everyone who's part of the problem becomes part of the solution.
The Stinky Fish is a metaphor for team issues. If you don't take care of them, they will start to rot until they stink. Even worse, everything around them becomes contaminated. The small issues quickly become the big things if left unattended.
I've helped many teams facilitate the Uncover the Stinky Fish Canvas to build not just an approach but the right mindset to talk about what everyone's thinking but no one is saying. After coaching and building the skills, the teams start facilitating those conversations on their own. Many of my clients now have weekly or monthly Stinky Fish sessions – they become a popular, effective practice.
The Uncover the Stinky Fish Canvas helps move conversations from the water cooler to the right forum.
4. Intercept Negative Gossip
Address negative gossip promptly before it spirals out of control. Redirect the conversation to address underlying issues by asking questions like, "Why do you feel this way?" or "What can we do to address this concern?"
When gossip turns personal – e.g., reputation or backstabbing – you need to cut it off immediately. Speaking up takes courage, but preventing emotional harm to a colleague is worth the risk. Help the gossiper realize the potential damage and how they'd feel if the tables were turned.
Professor LaBiana suggests neutralizing gossip by providing your perspective and adding context. People often see their side of the story. Highlighting a time when the targeted colleague did a good job can provide context and even neutralize the attacks.
I once worked with a team where gossip circulated about a manager showing favoritism when assigning 'cool' projects. My advice? Address the issue head-on by inviting people to volunteer for other 'cool' projects. Surprisingly, most people didn't raise their hands – they weren't actually interested in taking on more work. This revealed that a sense of ownership, not favoritism, drove the manager's decisions.
5. Encourage Open Disagreement
Contrary to popular belief, gossip doesn't only occur in toxic or fearful cultures. When a company becomes overly nice, intentionally or not, it can turn disagreement into something negative. People prioritize harmony to such an extent that they readily agree with each other – consensus becomes a form of belonging, and conflict turns uncomfortably personal.
To counter this, foster a culture where honest debates and challenging conversations happen publicly, aimed at improving ideas and solutions. When people feel empowered to voice their concerns openly, it diminishes the need for gossip and cultivates a more transparent and respectful environment.
For instance, Netflix's employees are encouraged to disagree openly and directly rather than behind the scenes. Silent disagreement is actually a behavior that's punished – employees must express their disagreement and explain why.
6. Challenge Your Company's Norms
Company policies should clarify expectations, but they often create more confusion than support. Many organizations have adopted "unlimited vacation" policies, yet employees are silently judged or penalized for taking time off. Similarly, remote work may be encouraged, but remote employees complain about being treated like second-class citizens – left out of decisions or company events.
Listen to people's gossip – what do their complaints say about your policies? Review your stated values and rules to identify gaps between words and actions.
Air New Zealand faced backlash for promoting Māori culture in its branding while prohibiting staff from displaying tattoos. Listening to these grievances prompted the company to eliminate that rule. For people of Māori descent, facial tattoos – tāmoko – are of particular importance. Men's moko kanohi cover the lower half or the entire face, while the women's moko kauae cover the chin and sometimes the lips.
7. Embrace Positive Conflict
In many organizations, conflict is treated as taboo – something to be avoided or softened through anonymous feedback or confidential surveys. However, avoiding conflict often backfires, creating a psychological safety bubble where tough conversations are sidestepped and gossip fills the void. Without open dialogue, people vent in private, avoid addressing underlying issues, and no one takes ownership. Anonymous feedback can make things worse by giving people a space to complain without accountability.
Instead, build a culture where conflict is embraced and addressed head-on. Redesign your town halls and open forums – shift the focus from "sharing" to "debating." Boost participation by encouraging employees to ask tough questions openly and commit to tackling the most difficult ones.
At Spotify, for example, employees can submit and upvote questions in advance, ensuring that the most crucial issues are discussed. Leaders never shy away from conflict, even when it's painful. The leadership often addresses employees’ concerns, despite recent criticism accusing Spotify's CEO of tone deafness.
Gossip in the workplace serves as a social tool that can foster connection and trust, but it can also lead to toxicity when negative.
By treating gossip as a signal, you can uncover communication gaps, misalignments, and underlying tensions affecting your team. Recognizing the various forms of gossip will help you distinguish between its harmful and beneficial effects. Implement the strategies outlined above to effectively manage gossip in your organization.
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